Thank you for visiting. My name is Debra Keirsey and I am so excited to share my journey and hard work with people from all walks of life. My journey started with a crisis in my own body, as peri-menopause started taking things from me that I had taken for granted. Like my ability to have penetrative orgasms with my husband of many years. I was devastated, I was angry, and I felt betrayed by my own body. I was hurting. The medical community was cruel, heartless and impotent in offering anything helpful. I was suicidal. We needed to do something! We decided to find answers ourselves and change the outcome, any way, by any means and any how. I researched to the ends of the internet, and started finding things that gave us both hope. The first gem I encountered was Sheri Winston’s book: Women’s Anatomy of Arousal. The biggest takeaway was: We had been doing sex wrong for my body’s needs. It’s a wonder I had received any pleasure at all from what we had been doing, and I credit my husband for the fact that I did, in spite of our ignorance. But it was time for a change.

Armed with this information, we started experimenting, and OH! the things I/we learned. This journey led us to many sources, curating information into a tool kit to supercharge our marriage and our life. This path eventually led me to Layla Martin, and after a few years of watching her YouTube channel, and deepening my own knowledge of my body and experimentation with breathwork, I decided to take the leap and sign up for her VITA Coaching Training. I had learned so much about peri-menopause, women’s arousal and orgasms, how to cultivate a marriage of intimacy, growth and thriving, and healing my wounds from a childhood of living with a misogynistic narcissist when I entered the VITA program, but I had no idea how much more growth and change awaited me in the program.

I wanted so badly to share what I had learned with others to help them, I wanted others to thrive, to reboot their marriages and long term relationships into the relationships they have always wanted, and I wanted women to be empowered by knowledge and be able to sit in community and support. I wanted to help women of all ages who are wounded, made to feel that being small is safe. This is what motivate me to invest in the 2 year program, and it’s what burns in me as a fire to this day, that fuels my desire to help others.

I want other women to be supported through peri-menopause and menopause and to not feel alone or in the dark like I did. This is unacceptable. We can do better and that is my mission.

In my own journey, I also learned things that have been withheld from men, and my husband has had his life transformed too. I want men to be fully in their power, to draw from their innate fire in themselves, and channel it through their hearts. This is where healthy masculinity lives. It’s BS that men have been taught to suppress and run from their full range of emotions. Men are wonderful, caring, sweet beings, but also, powerful, fierce warriors. All of this is good, and I want men to live fully in all of their value, their strength and their truth. It serves no one to have men live in shame for their parts that were never allowed to be shown. Who does this serve? Well, the Patriarchy hurts men as much as it hurts women and this truth needs to be shouted from the rooftops. I want to guide men to their own truth to gently face it, learn to embrace it and play with it. All of you is so lovable.

Also, on this journey, I have explored Fetlife. It’s worthy to just explore this edge for everyone, I believe. I am a member and I have learned better what I want and don’t want in this world, and I am still learning, playing and growing. Who knows where I will be in 5 years or 10 years? But I fully accept that what is seen as the “mainstream” of sexuality again, serves the Patriarchy for keeping us all muted in our sexual expression. Live in your truth, whatever that maybe. There is not one way to be sexual or fully alive in pleasure. I see pleasure and sexuality as separate. They can be combined together for sure, but also pleasure does not need to be sexuality. I want to support people who are exploring their kinks. I want to make it OK. If you are curious and feel some shame or trepidation, let’s explore that. I see a need. Be yourself, in whatever that looks like that helps your life thrive. I am here for you too.

One regret I have is that I wish I had learned all that I know now about women’s sexuality, women’s anatomy, women’s physiology, Tantric breathing and men’s sexuality when I was younger. What a waste to learn it in my 50’s. Better late than never, but the intimacy, sex and understanding my own pleasure so much better, means I have missed out on so much. I want to help women ages 18 to around 40 +/- 5 years (younger than perimenopause) also grow and thrive since all these things were not taught in school, not told by most families nor in any “sex ed” courses in high school, or even most science courses in college. I wish that child-bearing age women can easily live electric lives, be in their full confidence sexually and physically, and live magical lives. I want to share with you too, the VITA tools which can help you move past any limiting beliefs, and bask in the beauty of yourself and know you are worthy of great pleasure and finding the love of your dreams. I want that for you so badly. You were put here for a reason. Let’s find out how you can live your most authentic and vibrant truth.

The overarching theme is that I want to leave this world a better place than I found it. I want to help others move past their traumas, learn how to lean into the shadow places deep inside them that have been silenced. Let’s dust them off and let them roar, or at least let them just see the sun or light within. I want to give a voice to those of you who feel like silence is safety. I want to shine the light on darkness that alienates us, keeps us in suffering alone, and that hurts us. I want YOU, yes you, to be happy, healthy and thrive in this world. VITA has given me very powerful tools and I want to share them with you. This is my mission. I hope our paths cross, as you deserve no less.